Some guys can’t get a girlfriend because they can’t find a woman who wants to date them, but other guys can’t get a girlfriend because they can’t find a woman that they want to date!
If your ex-girlfriend was perfect, and now you can’t go anywhere near other women because you don’t feel like they are good enough, you got a problem. No matter how bad you want a girlfriend, it is going to be hard to find one until you dissolve the way you feel about your ex.[yop_poll id=”6"]
Why You Can’t Let Go Of The Perfect Ex-Girlfriend
First, get rid of the word ‘perfect’. There is no such thing as a perfect person. Can you honestly say she didn’t have one (or more) faults that drove you crazy or made you feel bad?
For whatever reason, you are painting her in a light that makes her seem perfect from your perspective right now.
Usually when you see her as perfect, there is one of two things going on.
1. You feel guilty
If a woman did what she could for you and tried to be a good girlfriend, but you still treated her poorly, then your guilt may be painting her in a light that shows off her perfections.
Seeing her as the perfect ex-girlfriend doesn’t mean she was the perfect woman for you, or that she was a perfect woman at all, it just means that she was a good woman and you didn’t appreciate that fact while you were with her, and now you are only seeing the good qualities she had.
You have to forgive yourself, let go of the guilt, and move on.
Recognize the traits that make her seem perfect, such as:
- Great in bed
- Similar values, beliefs, interests
…and move forward looking for a woman who has those traits. Because those are the traits that are making your ex-girlfriend look perfect, those are obviously the traits you admire, appreciate, and want in a relationship. And a lot of women have them!
2. She broke up with YOU and you feel hurt
It’s all fun and games until a woman breaks up with you.
You can treat her poorly or not appreciate the relationship, and it all feels good at that point, but when she breaks up with you it becomes a tragedy and you suddenly realize what a wonderful woman she is and how much you miss her!
This is so common that it is ridiculous!
It is human nature to want what we can’t have. When we have it, we don’t really understand how good it is, and when we lose it, we are acutely aware of the loss.
You are seeing her perfection because you are upset that you lost her and you want her back. Of course you are not going to be thinking about the bad qualities she has because you want her back so badly. If you thought about those bad qualties, then you wouldn’t want her as much.
Remember, no ex-girlfriend is perfect. No human is perfect!
Your ex-girlfriend probably had some great traits and made you feel good in one way or another, but you can live without her – AND you can find a better girlfriend with who you have such a great relationship that breaking up isn’t even an option to either of you.
Why You Need To Let Go Of The Perfect Ex-Girlfriend Before You Date Another Woman
Don’t force yourself to date another woman until you let go of the idea that your ex-girlfriend was the only one for you. If you do try to date someone else, then you are doomed to be involved in another break up very soon.
When you feel like no other women will compare (which is absolutely not true), you will make your new girlfriend feel like crap. She will feel as though she can’t compete with your ex-girlfriend and – honestly, why would she want to date you at that point?
Sh will most likely think – “If you think she was so perfect, then go and date her again!”
How To Let Go Once And For All
Your ex-girlfriend may have been a great woman, but she is not the only woman out there for you.
For instance, she may have been great in bed or made you feel like a superhero, but for whatever reason, your relationship has ran its course and it is time to move on.
You broke up for a reason, and remembering that reason will help you move forward and look for someone else with all the great traits of your ex-girlfriend without all the bad traits.
The sooner you accept that she is NOT the only woman out there, and that she is NOT perfect, the sooner you will be able to appreciate her and the relationship you had, but move on and find a woman even better than your ‘perfect ex-girlfriend’.