Do you have low self-esteem? Do you wish your self-esteem was higher? If you said, yes, then there are two things you can do:
- Sit around and hope that your self-esteem will magically improve
- Take life by the balls and take action on improving your self-esteem
It’s really that simple. If you do nothing, then nothing will change, but if you take action, then change is coming.
When Improving Self-Esteem Doesn’t Work
Sometimes we try to trick ourselves into thinking that our self-esteem is high when it isn’t, and when reality sets in and we remember that our self-esteem is low, our self-esteem can become even lower.
For example, we try to pretend that we are someone we are not, and for a while we feel great, but once something comes up that requires us to bring up our beliefs or habits, we revert back to our old selves – and our old way of feeling about ourselves – and we feel like a failure, which instantly lowers our self-esteem.
And, sometimes we try to do too much to change.
For instance, on New Year’s Day we go forward with a ton of resolutions that we know will improve our lives and make us happier, but it’s just too much to take on at once, so by February, pretty much all of our resolutions have been left behind and we revert back to our old selves.
So, don’t try to trick yourself or take on too much at one time. If you really want to improve your self-esteem, it is better to improve it one day at a time.
What’s The One Thing You Can Do To Improve Your Self-Esteem?
According to Caroline Myss, author of Self-Esteem: Your Fundamental Power, you can do something physical for yourself. In other words, pick something physical to work on that alters the way you look at yourself.
When you pick something that affects the way you see yourself, your viewpoint of yourself will start to change and you can then build upon that once you start to feel a positive shift.
I know this sounds simple, but it works.
For instance, I’ve been beating myself up over my body. If you do that at all, then you know that it has a huge impact on your self-esteem. But, after listening to Caroline’s program, I decided to pick one thing to do – which was exercise every day for a least 30 minutes. Small enough that it’s doable, but big enough that it’s different from what I do now. That simple habit has shifted the way I view myself. I feel stronger, more in control of myself, and my self-esteem has gone up. Even better, the benefits I have gotten from doing just this one thing have encouraged me to do more things.
So, pick one physical thing that will shift the way you view yourself. For example:
- Start working out every day
- Clean your house up
- Buy some new decorations for your home or room
- Clean yourself up
- Get a haircut
- Clean your car out
- Buy new clothes
- Change the color of your clothes
And, as you do one new thing for yourself, notice how you feel. If you feel a twinge of elevated self-esteem coming on from the act – great! If you don’t, find something else to do.
Take this on one day at a time. Don’t try to do something too big. As Caroline says, little things can be extremely powerful for your life.
The Downside To Doing This?
It takes energy.
Improving your self-esteem, even one little step at a time, takes work.
Some changes are going to require a lot more effort than others.
Some changes will need to become habits (like exercising) while others will be a little less effort (like rearranging your home).
But, if you really want to improve your self-esteem, you will have to stick with it. You will have to honor your commitment to improving your self-worth and put your happiness and confidence above other things.
The Upside Of Doing This?
Even though it takes some effort, it is worth it. The impact your self-esteem has on your life, including your dating life, is HUGE! In fact, after taking Caroline’s course, I now realize that self-esteem is at the center of everything we do.
It dictates how we interact with ourselves and the world, and it dictates where we are going in life – or whether we are going anywhere at all.
If you feel even a twinge of low self-esteem, then try doing one small physical thing towards it today. Notice the shift in how you feel, and let that shift move you towards committing to things that make you feel more empowered.
6 Pillars Of Self-Esteem
For some more motivation to build your self-esteem, watch the following video. It talks about 6 pillars to building self-esteem, and it should help you figure out where you need to build your self-esteem and motivate you towards doing it.