There’s no avoiding it – you will have to flirt with women sometime in your life. Flirting is the act of showing someone that you are interested in them and trying to make them interested in you. If you are attracted to a woman, you got to show it in some way. Flirting is done in the initial stages of meeting someone you like, and even in the later stages of your relationship where you want to show your partner just how much you still find them attractive. In short, flirting with women is a way to make them feel good about themselves and you, and there are many different ways to flirt with those women! But, there are some methods of flirting that shouldn’t be used – ever. They make things worse, not better. Following are a few of them.
1. Do Not Treat Women As Though They Are Inferior
Some guys, including some dating gurus, think that in order to flirt with women successfully you need to be condescending and treat them with disrespect. I’ve personally known a few of these guys and watched as they talked down to women as if they were children who couldn’t possibly understand what they were trying to say to them.
I think the mentality behind this for a lot of guys is that it will make women feel inferior thus making women want to:
a) please them because they are so much better than them.
b) show them that they are worthy of their greatness.
This type of ‘flirting’ may work for women with low self-confidence who are drawn to guys that are controlling and arrogant, but when it comes to women of value, this flirting tactic is not going to work. It’s going to piss them off, make them feel bad, and have the exact opposite effect of what flirting should be all about.
2. Do Not Be Too Sexual
I’ve seen guys flirt with women by whistling, biting their knuckles over how beautiful the women are, shaking their hands at her hotness, talking about their body and what they want to do with it over and over again, and all those other cheesy and sex-focused ways of flirting.
Telling a woman that she has great boobs and a great ass may work in some situations (like a drunk night out), but when you only focus on her boobs and ass, then your flirting is going to turn into unwanted attention. Why?
Flirting with a woman should be about making her feel good and showing interest in her, and when you are constantly looking at her body, making gestures about her body, and talking about her body, then it shows her that you are interested in one thing – her body. This is fine if the woman you are talking to is looking for casual sex, but if she is looking for something a little more serious (which most women are) then you are going to come across as a player and a jerk to her, and your flirting won’t be received well.
3. Do Not Flirt With Women Through Text If You Can’t Write Well
Texting is an easy way to flirt with women, and some guys know how to do it right, but many guys are horrible writers and can’t convey the messages they want to send. Instead, their messages are confusing, send the wrong message, and turn women off.
If you are unsure of how good you are flirting over text, then don’t do it until you learn how to text in a way that develops an attraction, not repels it.
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4. Do Not Flirt During Times Of Business
If you work with a woman you like, then that’s great! Statistics show that couples who meet at work are most likely to end up in happy and committed relationships. However, how you flirt with a woman from work can make or break your chances with her.
If you try to flirt with women at work while they are WORKING and focused on their work, then you could come across as annoying and inappropriate. Especially because women are still dealing with the image of being the weaker sex in a business place and, therefore, can easily take things the wrong way. They may think you are downplaying their importance at work and only view them as an object of attraction. And, they may think that you are going to take them less seriously if they let you think that you are right about them. That’s why it’s best to flirt outside of the work environment where their mind is not focused on work and their work status.
I recommend first talking to a woman you like at work and building a relationship where you like each other and trust each other on some level. No flirting needs to be done to do this.
Then, if you go to a work function, take the opportunity to do some light flirting with that woman that you like. If she shows interest, then great. If not, then she may not be willing to date someone that she works with for the very reasons I mentioned above or more.
And as an extra note about how to flirt with women at work – don’t do it too often. Pick a woman that you like and make her a priority over other women at work. If you flirt with too many women at work, then your female employees are going to see you as a player who just wants to hook up with any woman, and you will become an unattractive option to most of the women you work with.
5. Do Not Say Anything That An Online Commentator Would Say
I believe that a lot of jerks get their flirting tactics from YouTube and Twitter and other places where people just say whatever the hell they want because they can. We see rude, perverted, and mean comments so much towards women that they have become the normal thing, and some impressionable people have adopted these comments as a way of relating to women thinking that it’s funny or perfectly OK.
Have you seen some of the disgusting comments men leave for women on blogs or vlogs? Have you left one? You can’t say those types of things to women and expect them to fall for you. Even if a disgusting comment gets 1000 likes on YouTube, those likes are coming from jerks who agree with the comment or little boys who find the comment funny.
In short, just because you post those types of ‘flirting’ comments or read those types of comments and find they get a reaction from women, doesn’t mean you should ever, EVER, use them in real life.
6. Do Not Use Song Lyrics
If you can’t think of anything to say when you want to flirt with a woman, then don’t randomly pick a song and use the words from it. In fact, don’t pick words from a poem, YouTube video, or book that you read recently. This is not because the words won’t work…they could. But if you say them wrong, they will sound scripted and unnatural, and that will make you look like you are either:
a) saying the line you always say to women.
b) saying something that is completely fake just for the sake of saying it.
Both will turn a woman off more than it will attract her!
The bottom line is that you have to learn how to be original with you flirt with women and focus on things that actually pertain to them and make them, as an individual, feel good about themselves and you as you flirt with them.
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